Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink successfully, pays, and leaves. Three weeks later he dies tragically.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay boys house. Knock knock! whose there? The chicken!!

Why was the woman sad on her 21st birthday? Because she was born on September 11,1980

What do you call a black man who lands on the moon? An astronaut...f*cking racist.

Ask me if I'm a horse. Are you a horse? No.

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

Did you hear about the man with the bicycle? He was 2 tired.

someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

Mail Man: *Knocks on door* Guy & Girl: WHAT?! *laughing* Mail Man: Mail! Guy & Girl: Hold on she is almost done with the whip cream.

A man walks into a bar, it's funny because he is an alcholholic

why is justin bieber so pale? Because he hasn't come out of the closet.

A Penguin walk into a bar and asks "Have you seen my brother?" And the bartender replies "What does he look like?"

why cant the porcupine marry the balloon? ...neither one can talk.. obviously.

Who is Dank? A: Billal

How many pollacks does it take to screw in a lightbuld? Likely the same number as is required when people of non-polish descent screw in lightbulds. Overall however it is variable based on the number or bulbs, position of bulbs in relation to ceiling, potential shakiness of required ladder, and desired efficiency. Please reference GE's lightbuld home instillation handbook for further information or alternately contact your local electrician or handy neighbor.

read me write me

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

What's worse than finding a worm on your apple? Trench foot on your eyebrow.

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket? A blender. How do you get them out? Tortilla chips.

what's black, white and doesn't float? the titanic

whats worse than the holocaust? nothing

why did the little girl fall off the swing? she was a double amputee.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To reach his desired destination.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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