A guy walks into a bar and orders a beer. There is a frog in his beer.

What do Kobe Bryant and a toaster have in common? They both rape white women. Except for the toaster.

what is the difference between Rick Perry and Lindsay Lohan? it only takes Lindsay 4 1/2 hours to finish a sentance.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

You stink so bad that you should cleanse yourself via shower and/or bath.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

Q: What happens when you divide by zero. A: You get a complex kind of infinite.

Why did the kid fall off his bike? His mum threw a fridge at him.

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

I was gonna make a gay joke but those are insensitive, and gays have feelings like everyone else

Why did the man open up a umbrella? Because it was raining..

What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

Q: How many nuns does it take to eat a dead racoon? A: 2

Roses are red, Violets are brown, F*** who's had a shit in my garden.

Why did the homeless man not get any ice cream from the store? Because he was not very bright and didn't try in school. Therefore he couldn't find a job or get his job back at the janitor at Go-Mart. This proves that not doing your school work correct can really effect your future. Plus they was sold out of chocolate.

You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

knock knock who's there? dave dave who? dave suddenly burst into tears as his grandmothers altzimers became so serious she forgot his name

How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? One.

Jesus walks into a hotel, slams four nails down on the counter, and says, "Put me up for the night!" The concierge looks at him and says, "You're not Jesus. Jesus was brutally murdered approximately 1,970 years ago. And although I may not be a believer, his teachings have brought comfort and solace to millions of people around the world. Nor do we accept nails as payment. Please remove yourself from the premises or I will call security."

The banana, the raspberry and the pear arrived to the party, then the carrot and the tomato arrived as well, but when the apple and the orange arrived the banana left... ...This where just getting to fruity...

What did Batman say to robin before they got in the batmobile? "Robin, get in the batmobile!"

What did the def blind mute kid get for christmas? He doesnt know either

4 Jews are killed during a car accident, the whole city mourns over there death and create a plaque in their honor.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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