Person A: I think your father might be a thief, I'm not sure though. Person B: How come? person A: I cannot find my virginity. Person B: I apologize my dad taught me well.

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why do black people like kool-aid? it's a tasty refreshment

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Why did the man die? He had a terrible form of flesh-eating bacteria and he suffered a lot of pain.

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What do you call a man with a spade in his head? ...An innocent, family orientated murder victim.  X

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why do people put their pants on in the morning? because their not nudists.

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how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

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What do you call a magic owl? HOO-DINI!

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what's better than winning a gold metal at the special olympics? not being retarded.

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Why didn't the parachute open? nevermind

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What do you call an apple in a washing machine? My lunch!

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Like this if you have a big diick like me Dislike if you have a baby diick Ignore if you're a girl and get back in the kitchen

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What would Abraham Lincoln do if he were alive today? Scream and scratch at the lid of his coffin.

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Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my son is gay, f**k my life...

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why did the child fail to make his bed? because he has downs syndrome and he is incapable of participating in everyday activities.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's house? Neither has he.

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Hey, do you want to play the rape game ? NO! That's the spirit

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? A: Cancer

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Q: How did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was dead Q: How did the second monkey fall out of the tree? A: It was taped on to the first one!

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How do you get a ninja to do a backflip? Ask him nicely.

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Q: Holy do you get a nun pregnant? A: You have sexual intercourse with her, and have an orgasm inside her body. Also, in vitro fertilization is a viable, albeit expensive, alternative for couples who have difficulty conceiving by standard intercourse.

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if someone chucks skittles at u and says "taste the rainbow!!!!" chuck m&ms at them and say "Im not afraid!!!!!"

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An old man walks into a movie theater, has a stroke, and dies as his family screams for help and attempts to revive him to no avail.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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