Knock Knock, Who's there? Alzheimer's Alzheimer's who? Knock Knock...

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there were two cyclists cycling at a steady pace down a main road in china, one irish and the other chinese. now they happened to be cycling at exactly the same time and exactly the same pace. why did the irish cyclist get pulled over and the chinese not? because the irish cyclist had in fact brutally raped and murdered a young child in his home town and then fled the country to china.

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Yo mama so ugly she's ridiculed daily and has frequent suicidal thoughts.

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How do you make a French-man cry? Kill his family.

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Why was the little girl crying? She got raped by a giant scorpion.

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Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

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What's green, has six legs and would kill you if it fell on you out of a tree? A pool table.

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There was once a boy who ate fire. He died of severe burns.

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whaT DID HEVEN SAY TO THE FRIDGE hAVE YOU GOT A COLD

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if life gives you lemons. squeeze one into your moms eye.

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What did the horse say to the cow? Nothing because animals cannot speak.

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What happens when you give a Parrot a pack of cigarettes? Animal Rights Activists get upset and condemn your actions.

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Q: why did the monkey fall out of the tree? A: because it was dead.

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The new Minons film reminds me of most foreign films.. You can't undertand a fucking word they say and they're all yellow

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I was eating a sandwich when someone came up to me and said "sharing is caring" So I gave him a grenade He asked "where's the pin" I said " I pulled it for you" This is not an anti joke

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Women are only good for two things... Being raped and being raped in the ass.

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Man sees a hot girl. The hot girl sees him. The man asks her out on a date. After five years of dating he asks for her hand in marriage. She says "No way, I'm married you horror!!!" The man cries and moves in with his mom... Two days later he commits suicide.

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A blonde walks into a bar ouch

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What's the new green? Green

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2 men were in a bar, One was talking to the other, "I was walking down the street someone fell." "ha" "isis it true?" "What" "isis" and a bomb went off and they all died

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What would it take to reunite the Beatles? Two more bullets.

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when life gives you lemons your like wait how did i get these lemons??

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What do you get when you stab a man in the leg with a knife? A court summons because you have committed a horrible crime

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I literally died laughing

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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