what did the man say to his cat? sex. -teagan doherty

what is worse than a guy pissed?

Why did the little boy fall asleep? His parent pulled the plug.

Invention I totally meant invention! XD, now okay, you can have the top comment, ill even read it because I like ya a lot.

A dyslexic man hears a joke, and laffs.

An American, a Mexican, and a Chinese person are in an airplane. The three of them ponder throwing someone out for a racist reason, but decide to fly to the destination.

How do you stop a dog from barking? Cut it's head off

Does that doctor take insurance? No, the receptionist takes the insurance, the doctor takes your blood... Well actually, the nurse does that.

Why was the bartender's baby crying upstairs? Because it was being raped.

What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? Being raped... What's worse than being raped? The Holocaust What's worse than the Holocaust? Finding two flies in your soup

Why is the spine-tailed swift is the fastest bird? Because its faster than the second fastest bird

Roses are red Violets are blue Tulips are white Dandelions are yellow

a gay man got shot outside his house even though he was just checking the male get it checking the male

I met a fat girl and fucked her on an elevator. . . It was wrong on so many levels.

How do you torture Helen Keller? You put her on a table and slowly pull her limbs off

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farmer left his fence open and the chicken happened to cross a road.

what do you get when you cross a broken arm and a broken leg? a broken head.

Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm colorblind.

Boys go to college to get more knowledge, girls go to Jupiter... Actually I lied, girls go to the kitchen

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

do you know what was a good idea? not last night

If 1+1=2, then you must have passed first grade arithmetic.

A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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