Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

why did the man sell the car and bought worse one? it' s his hoby to restore cars

What's the difference between a 1980 mustang and a pile of dead babies? I don't have the mustang in my garage.

How do you kill a pirate? Throw him of a bridge

I don't want to hear another joke about female hygiene, PERIOD! -Lets go Mets

How did the ball fall from the cup? It didn't, it happened to be tied to a string attached to the cup.

what do you call a black man in a cop car? a policeman

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

What color is cotton? White Well in Afrca, they grow black cotton

Two muffins are in the oven, one muffin says "Gosh it's hot in here!", the other muffin says "HOLY CRAP A TALKING MUFFIN!".

Chuck Norris was dropped twice when he was a baby, once on concrete and once on hardwood

knock knock!? . . No.

roses are red violets are blue your moms a whore thats it

Roses are red, and blood is too. But violets are purple. NOT FUCKING BLUE.

Chuck Norris can get a nuke in Black Ops.

Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

What's the dumbest animal in the rainforest? A polar bear.

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

SpiderMan, under that mask and your superhero clothes who are You really? Under these clothes, I...Am.... naked

why do ducks have webbed feet? to stomp out fires. why do elephants have flat feet? to stomp out the burining ducks.

A man quites his job to open a coffee shop which has been a dream of his for years, The shop does well with a healthy supply of customers and a steady income,The man is now financially stable.

What did the man say to the teacup? Nothing. He was drunk and on the floor.

What do you call a guy with aids? Your dad

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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