A man lying in bed at night rolls over and starts rubbing his wife's back. She says, "Not tonight, honey, I have a headache." Her husband respected her wishes and went to sleep.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

—Conversation started today— My God, why have you forsaken me? Seen 6:00 PM

My grandfather died in a concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck.

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

Why did the girl not get her mum a christmas present? Because she was adopted to two men when she was born, so it would be hard to give her mum a present...............................................

Why did the chicken cross the road? Cause it wanted to

wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

A clueless chicken walks into a bar. Now being cooked on the BBQ.

What's worst then getting struck by lightening? your face.whats worse then seeing your face? NOTHING

whats fun,atracks children and says wrape van on it my van i lied about it being fun

why did the chicken cross the road? cause kade touches himself at night

Your mama's so fat, she can't even find clothes that fit her well.

Yo mamas so fat, when she jumps in a pool she displaces a disproportionate volume of water.

Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

melons are berries, tomatoes are fruit, being a smart-ass isn't that good.

why did bob marley die because he did also he smoked weed he was naughty!

I drive a 'rarri

What did the man say to his wife before she made him a sandwhich? Do your job and make me a sandwhich.

Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

Boy: Hey girl if I had hand-cuffs, I’d lock myself to you right now! Girl: I would find that extremely creepy.

What did the father say to his son? ....nothing

hold the planet Dumb ass well I'm doing something else right now dumb ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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