What happens when you tickle a rabid iguana? It bites you and you die.

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Why is SkrillEX bad at fishing? S EX

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How do you get your lawyer to shut up. Hit him with a bat.

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Where do cows go in their free time? burger king.

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How do you scare a lawyer? Threaten to kill his family.

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i have read and agree to the terms of service

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Why did the boy have pink skin at night? Because he did not put on a sufficient amount of sunscreen that morning. This is also known as sunburn.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Probably because this chicken had a mental disability and saw on the news that there was a hospital on the other side of the road that could treat his illness and possibly save his life, allowing him to fulfill his life-long dream of retirement. But knowing that chickens do not possess the brain power capable of understanding the situation that this chicken was in, it had probably gotten lost and just wandered off.

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Why can't Abraham Lincoln tell a lie? Because he's dead.

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What's more greasy than grease? Kevin's hair

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A man walked in to a bar, he ordered a few drinks, met some new friends and had a good laugh with them. Later that night, he got in his car and drove home, which was foolish, as he should have known that being under the influence of alcohol increases the percentage of a collision, which could take his life and the lives of others. He arrived home just fine and got in to bed with his wife who was happy to see him.

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What stars with C, is hairy on the outside, moist on the inside and ends with T and has UN in the middle? Coconut

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My mates dad hasnt had a job in 20 years... its probably why there all homless outside my house.

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Whats grosser than a bloody hand? 2 bloody hands.

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A horse walks into a bar. the bartender asks: "How's the family?" The Horse says: "they are fine." Everyone runs out screaming because Horses can't talk, except the bartender. He has a mental illness.

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What did the Orange say to the Apple? Nothing. Both of them are lifeless objects, thus lacking the ability to speak.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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how did hitler lure the jews onto trains to concentration camps? he told them he hid a penny in one of the cars

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I like my women like I like my coffee... In a cup.

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What did one apple say to the other???? Well, since they are fruits, and not people, they were unable to talk...

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What's red, green and smells like crap? Green and red crap.

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What's wrong with black people? They tend to make mistakes, as do all humans

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what did "A" and "B" look for when they went to the beach? what are you talking about? letters cannot travel!

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You're in the middle of the ocean and you see a roller coaster. What color is the penny? Tree.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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