Back in my day,we used to have Johnny Cash,Bob Hope and Steve Jobs. Now we have higher divorce rates.

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why did the man jump out of the plane without a parachute? Im not really sure, maybe to commit a slow and painful suicide.

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The past, the present and the future walk into a bar. It was tense.

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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How do you get 1,000 dead babies into a car? Blender How do you get them out? Straw

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What is small, red, and can't fit through a doorway? A baby with a spear through its head. Posted By: Lram

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Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

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You're rowing a canoe upstream and a wheel falls off, how many pancakes can you fit in a dog house? None because icecream doesn't have bones.

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A skeleton walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face? the skeleton replies I have aids.

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Knock Knock The doors already open

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if you fall, I'll be there. -floor

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What did the chicken do? He crossed the road.

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Q: Whats about two feet in width and length with purple veins throbbing at the sides? A: A midget slowly dying of frostbite

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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Why did the man yell? Cause he wanted to!

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A man walks into a bar. There were no survivors.

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's. Hi my name is Bob and I have Alzheimer's.

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A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

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Justin Bieber's gay!! My butt is sexier!(;

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“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

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A man was walking down the street He was then killed in a drive by.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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How do you fit four gay men on a bar stool? You build an exceptionally large bar stool

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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