A man is in a bar with a drink A lorry driver come in a gulp the guys drink down The man starts crying the lorry driver says"don't cry I will buy you another" The guy says "it's not that: Today I woke up late for work and when I finally got there my boss fired me so I get in my car to go home and it wont start so I walk home while it's raining and when I got in I found that my wife was sleeping with the gardener so I came down here and asked for some poison and you went and drank it"

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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What did the chair say when someone sat on it? Nothing. The person's butt covered the chair's mouth.

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why did the chicken cross the road? because it was diagnosed with cancer and didn't want to live any more

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Which is rather deceiving, Considering that the name 'violet' should naturally insinuate that the object it is describing is violet as well. Violet as a color is generally a deep shade of purple. Therefore, shouldn't the aforementioned plant, the 'violet', be violet in color as opposed to the blue color that is most widely accepted by the general populous?

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Why didn't the black man sit in the front of the bus Because he lives in a society where it is illegal and socially unacceptable for a person of African decent to sit in towards the front of the bus, near the driver, which is most commonly reserved for a person of European decent.

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Can you get me a stapler,but make sure it has staples or else I won't be able to staple anything

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What did silly Billy with no arms get for Christmas ? Gloves.. why did silly billy fall off the swing? He got hit by a microwave.. Why did silly sally fall off the swing? She had no arms.. Knock Knock Whos there? Not sally..

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She doesn't have arms. Knock, knock, Who's there? Not Sarah.

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What's awesome about going to a no-pants party? Getting stabbed 2 times.

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Yo mamma is so old that she lives in a retirement home for the aged, and will most likely die there in several years.

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I can't remember the punchline for this joke so I recommend you stop reading this...why are you still reading this whats wrong with you!!!!

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How did the clown get the baby to stop crying? He hit it with an axe.

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How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

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what kind of person would you call dumb the ones who read anti jokes

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Why wasn't the TV remote working? It was out of batteries.

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How many police does it take to change a lightbulb? None, they all beat the room for being black.

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What did Thomas Jefferson's children call him? Grandpa

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What was the black guy doing in Mississippi? Just hanging around.

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What do you call a group of geese? A giggle

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your mother is so fat that she probably watches her calorie intake every day

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Why couldn't the kitten drink its milk? Because his face was stapled to the wall.

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how does hitler drink soup ? with a spoon

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Q: Why do geese fly in a V? A: It's more aerodynamic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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