Man#1: Who's John? Man#2: John is John. Who else do you want him to be? Why do you ask stupid questions? Are you naturally this dumb? Do you like the questions I ask? Man#1: (Turns away as he is deeply offended by the man who rudely answered his question.)

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Why did the little boy viciously slash the orange object with a carving knife? Because it was Halloween.

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What did Mel Gibson say to his wife? I apologise for my rude behaviour and intolorable cursing.

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A seal walks into a club. And proceeds to die. Why? The seal isn't able to walk so it was crawling and a man was swinging a club to it's head, so it perished and he could feed his family. The Statement was censored by the FCC

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A man spoke in a high-pitched voice. Another man said "Are you gay" He responded, "Why, yes"

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I am Asian, I've seen the color blue, but God made a mistake, Asians are taller than you.

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What do Michael Jackson and a throbbing, greasy, overcooked Shitake Mushroom have in common? Nothing. Just nothing at all.

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Time flies an arrow. Fruit flies like banana.

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Dubstep = a computer with a noisy virus.

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wats green, fuzzy, and if it fell out of a tree, it would kill u? a pool table

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Why did a little kid have a long face Because his face was stretched out by a truck wheel

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A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

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Why did the little hamster die? Because it had a careless owner who never paid any attention to it. therefor it passed away.

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what did one dog say to his sex partner? woof woof

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Sprechen zie deutsche? nein!

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What do you say when you wake up in the middle of the night and see your tv floating in mid air? Drop It Niggher!

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Knock Knock Who's there? Ash Oh hey Ash, I was expecting you, come on in!!

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A blonde, brunette, and redhead find a cliff that is supposed to turn you into something which you exclaim upon leaping from the cliff. The brunette jumps off and exclaims: BIRD! She thus falls to her death on a ton of pointy rocks. The other two loot her corpse and walk away.

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What do pancakes and Smokie Bear have in common? They both don't have aids

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Whats black white and red all over? A decapitated panda.

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A man walked into a bar, he was meeting his friends but was half an hour early, so he went down the road and got a burger. He had recently began dieting to maintain a healthy weight, but had trouble with self control. 30 years later he would gamble away his family's life savings and then go onto live a long and unfulfilled life.

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Q: Why is daddy wrestling mommy? A: Well Jimmy, that is called sexual intercourse. That is how you were created, and many people of all ages engage in this activity every second.

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whats 7+4? 74

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Why did Sally dance and record it on Vine? She did it for the Vine

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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