Grandma used to say "you only die once." Years later, I learned the wisdom behind those words.

There is a very old lady at the bottom of a long flight of steep stairs with a large amount of groceries piled up in her hands. How did she make it to the top?? She walked.

what do you call a cow on a rollercoaster? a very dangerous and unlikely event

A black guy walked in to a gas station, walked up to the counter and payed for his items with his debit card.

Nero, please cut the bull, I know you work for the feds, you are involved with the FBI, I know, but its not my problem, I just do not like you lying to me.

Why did the horse go to the doctor? It had a heart disease.

Knock knock Who's there? Miley Cyrus Holy moly, please come in! Here's your Miley Cyrus CD you order online Thanks you Mr. Mail Man

Why did the little girl fall off of the swing set? Because she didn't have any arms.

Q:What do you call a black priest? A: A great quality volunteer at a local church.

what is white on top and black on the bottom? society... ha ha

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a blue whale? A: About 10 pounds.

What did Batman say to Robin before they got into the car? Get in the car, Robin.

Why is 6 afraid of 7? 7 is a terrorist.

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

A blind man crosses the street... he is hit by a car

What's funnier than 100 dead babies? Everything.

Why did the black man buy a watermelon..... so he can eat it.

A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

What`s the difference between a dead baby and a pencil? I don`t keep a pencil in my backpack

Who won the championship last year? There was no championship

knock knock whos there? aids aids who? aids aids who? i dont go away

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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