Why did the girl go to the hospital? Her brother dared her to jump off the second story roof of their house...

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Whats worse than losing your phone? Buying a new one and then losing that

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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why was the man afraid of the tree? Because it ate his mother!!!!!!

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how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? open the door and put him in.

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why did benny go to the 4th grade school nurse? he had a massive erection.

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Laughter and joy... You are really sweet you know.. Excuuuse me princess! But Like Mickey Mouse never changed... From a Potato peeler to some fuckup private detective in a trenchcoat. So tell me, what character did Walt Disney draw before Mickey Mouse?

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Today's Horoscope for Cancer: You have Cancer.

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Modern math questions: If I have 9 apples and you have 12 ice cubes, his many pancakes fit on a roof? Purple, because aliens don't wear hats.

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Did you hear the one about the girl who had three nipples? Neither did I.

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What's 9+10? 19.

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Mini mouse was brutally killed n Oakland Now Mickey is a Chinese member of the crips in Compton Remember don't forget to see the new Disney movie, Mickey Goes Gang-Bangin

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What's white and looks like paper? Paper.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.The chicken was very distressed and trying to get away from the angry mob that followed close behind it.The chicken was never seen again. If you see a distressed chicken please contact your local police station.

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Q: What did the boy with no arms or lags get for christmas? A: He dosent now he cant open them.

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if you're jesus and you know it, clap your hands

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They sent her to her room without dinner.

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Why did the Catholic Priest get arrested? Tax-evasion.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because, 32!

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How do you stop a bus? You don't, and Regina George didn't either.

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girl. have you seen my duck man. yes he is with me right now girl rely you have him man. yes in my diner girl. d.i.c.k. man.f u

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Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

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Haikus are easy, But sometimes they don't make sense. Refrigerator.

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Why did Peter Piper pick a peck of pickled peppers? Peppers help strengthen his immune system.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops