Whats worse than getting hit in the face with an axe? Getting hit in the face with two axes.

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If I could rearrange the alphabet, I'd put my cock in your mouth. Submitted by Arsha K.

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A woman asked a man in an elevator, "Did you fart?" The man honestly replied, "Yes. I didn't expect you to notice because it was the puffy kind."

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Q: What do Ethiopians eat at night? A: Nothing.

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Q: What Would Canada Be With out Nature A: Peru

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How did the Mexican get into the United States? He showed his passport, and the correct documents & information, and was admitted into the country as a new American citizen.

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*Wear a Mario costume* What happened to Luigi? I ate him.

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I found a lump on my right testicle. So, as a precaution I went to my local hospital to have myself checked out. Thankfully, it wasn't accute testicular cancer. Instead I only had to suffer for a few months, but it's getting better now. Sadly, I won't be able to have children and now my semen has a somewhat unsavoury flavour. Thanks for asking.

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One man says to the other man "Hello Sir, how are you this morning?" He replies "I am doing rather well, and how are you?" The first man replies "Quite good." And they continue about their day.

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Why a man without hands and without legs want to stay in a barrel? He actually doesn't, but is unable to get out of it.

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Whats the difference between a black man and a picnic table? Alot of things

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Whats in your pants, might get caught in your zipper and you may hold it all day. your pocket.

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Eating food: Ugh disgusting! Taking a dump later: THIS IS DELICIOUS! Man, you are doing it wrong... Waterworld was a pretty dry movie, I mean when are they gonna start making movies with a bit of wet humor for a change? SERIOUSLY BELIEVE ME WHEN I SAY I AM NOT SERIOUS!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a duck? Purple.

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How do you kill a Jewish person? You shoot him multiple times in the face

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Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

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what happened when u got some swag? i don't know u still don't have any

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Why couldn't the teen go to the prom? He was busy working to help his mom recover from breast cancer.

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A Jew walks into a gas chamber...

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Why did the monkey eat the pineapple? IDK, ask Sam D

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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Reading the Terms and Conditions

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A seal walks into a club.

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So a man walks into a bar and gets a drink, then a man walks up to him and tries to start a fight, the first man says, "No thanks" and walks home.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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