Why did Suzie fall off the swing? Because her dad pushed her too hard -Knock knock -Who's there? -Suzie, I'm dead now with a knife through my neck and I'm ready to kill you since you didn't forward that chain letter, now hold still so I can chop off your toes one by one and peel your skin off then leave a bloody mess for your parents -k

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A women gets a call saying her only daughter is trapped inside a burning building. She runs as fast as she can too her car before she realizes... women can't drive due to their role in society, so she returned to the kitchen and continued to make her master's sandwhich.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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What do you get when you put two landsharks together? Three landsharks.

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who lives a pineapple under the sea? a proper spazztwat.

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Whats red and bad for your teeth??? A brick!!!

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What do you call it when a plane crashes into a school? A terrible accident.

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Why Is Billy So Dumb? He Didin't Pass School

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Your mother is so fat that she's more prone to cardiovascular disease than other people who stick to the proper BMI or body mass index

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not?

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knock knock? Whos there? a questionable person. What? exactly.

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what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? i lost my tractor

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Me: Mike Mike: Yeah Me: The more you breath the more pissed off im getting.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, your Mom is a fake, she adopted you!

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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Three Lawyers are walking, one falls down, gets up and continues walking

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Why did the chicken cross the road? So it could cause traffic accidents.

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When will pigs fly? When they grow horns

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So I'm blowing this guy and he starts rubbing his finger through my hair... So I started thinking, what a fag.

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Why did the wheel fall of the car?? Cause you can't fit 10 pancakes inside of a doghouse.

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What's worse than finding gum on your shoe? Being molested by a sea urchin.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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Knock knock It's open, come in

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Whats similar between an apple and a black guy there is no similarities between them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops