how do you scare a blonde person? dress up in orange and scream "mustard"

how much fish could a chicken

Silence is golden, duct tape is silver.

Why did the gay man not walk straight? Because I took a jack hammer to his foot

how do you get a clown to fall off a swing? hit him with an ax

Why did the boy wear a winter jacket on the hottest day of the year? Because the boy was in antarctica and the hottest day was still below freezing.

What is funnier than 24 69

How do you make a napkin dance? You can't. Stop having such unrealistic aspirations.

What do you call a Knight who farts a lot? Sir Farts-a-lot

What should you do when a man carrying a stuffed tortoise tries to break into your house? Call the police.

what did the guy say before he went to kill the other guy? Im killing you

What do kittens and napkins have in common? You can sneeze into both of them except the kitten doesn't like it

Why did the car catch fire? It was parked in Ferguson, MO

What's five miles long and has an IQ of 40? A democrat parade.

What do you get when you cross a cat and a dog? A dead cat.

There's a priest, doctor, and blonde on a plane. At the end of the flight they all go their separate ways.

Ready for something funny? nothing

What's worst that cancer? Murder porn

whats fat, green and hairy? Nothing I would pleasure myself to.

Whats worse than 2 babies in a trashcan. 1 baby in 2 trashcans

A haiku for you Would not provide enough space To say all the nice

Your mother is so stupid that she had to study, a lot.

Why did the chicken die? Because it was crossing a busy road.

What do you get when you mix a donkey with a bungee cord? My bouncy ass

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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