What's the difference between a lawyer and a catfish? One is a bottom-feeding scum sucker, and the other is an advisor who assists people by representing them on legal matters.

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Why did the child cry? His sister just left for college

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What is red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

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knock knock who's there me me who It's me your son who was in prison for 6 years for false charges of attempted homicide

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Why didn't Susan go to school on show-and-tell day? Because she's dead.

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If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

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What happened when the chicken got to the other side of the road? It didn't, it got hit by a car.

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What did the woman say to the man before she had sex with him? "May I have sex with you, please?"

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2001, 2 airplains fly into the world trait centers. the pilots then had their licences taken away.

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What was the only animal to not board the ark in pairs? Loads of animals because it didn't happen.

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A seal walks into a club. The poacher continues to beat the seal to death.

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roses are red you are dumb no one will care when you die

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Q. Whats the worst soccer team in the world. A. Ass-enal.

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Yo mama's so ugly, she has difficulty attracting a partner.

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Evidently, in order to get any person of an object (most notably a swing) you must hit them with some form of large and/or sharp object.

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Roses are red Bacon is red Poems are hard Bacon

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why did the Mexican eat a octopus because he was hungry would die if he didn't

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Why do elephants have such big ears? So they can hear really well.

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A young man was lost wandering in a field, when he came upon a small house. He knocked on the door and was greeted by a scary southern man with a shotgun in hands. "I'm lost," said the man. "Can you put me up for the night?" "Certainly," the man said, "but on one condition. If you so much as lay a finger on my daughter, I will shoot you with this shotgun." He couldn't have sex with the daughter because he has severe erectile dysfunction.

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The New York Giants

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What did the white man say to the group of mexicans when a golf ball was coming toward them? 4!

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Why is Joe is ugly? I dont Know

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Why are aspirins white? Because the creator of aspirin didn't feel it necessary to color the pills.

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What did the doctors tell the boy with cancer who is on his way to being released from the hospital? "you are going to die," why give him hope and be proved wrong. This way if they are wrong the whole situation is a miracle, if they are right..... "I told you so"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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