I was watching this movie..... its over now.

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Your momma so stupid, she speaks poorly and can't spell very well.

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Did you hear about the guy who lost the left side of his body in an accident? He bled to death.

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What starts with N, ends with R, and is a black guy? NeighboR!

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A man walks into me and I say: "WATCH IT PUNK!"

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Q: why does the fire breather hate his job A: his parents were burned to death MR

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whats the stage after cancer? you die

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You come across a blonde, a brunette, and a red head. Why are you telling a joke? Go make sex.

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Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't. Her head was stuck in the oven.

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? After losing its family, the chicken had became an adrenaline junkie and enjoyed the rush of doing such dangerous things. It subsequently became addicted to opium.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I dont really care anymore BECAUSE I'M SICK AND TIRED OF THIS CLICHE!

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Q: You know what's worse than being a mother? A: Almost everything, because being a mother is not a bad thing, in fact, it's a wonderful thing.

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Salt: "Hi there!" Slug: "AAÀAAAAAAAAAGGGHHHHH!!!" *dies*

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What is green and smells like paint? Grass, it doesnt smell like paint, I lied.

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What is ET short for? Extra terrestrial

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how do you kill chuck norris? you dont, killing is illegal

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How many tickles does it take to make an octopus laugh? Eight, because there's one tickle per tentacle!

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What's the difference between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple. Except for the elephant.

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why dont black people celebrate thanksgiving? kfc is closed on holidays

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How did the monkey fall out of the tree? because it died. how did the second monkey fall out of the tree? because it was stapled to the other monkey.

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What do you call a cow who can't produce milk? Utter failure.

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Why is it bad luck for a black cat to cross your path? I'll tell you in Heaven

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what did Marvin Gay's father say to him before he died? "hey come listen to this 45 real quick"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops