Q: How do Hellen Keller's parents punish her? A: They give her a timeout

Why did little Annie fall off the swing? Cause her penis was too heavy.

If I was, yet this syndicate was a legal one, necessary in order to maintain world peace trough the means of economical stability and such, would this be acceptable to you? Hypothetically of course.

Why was the 18 year boy afraid of his dad? Cause his dad butt raped him when he was 7.

A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Yeah, I know too, its as if "Omg he has not replied in 5 seconds something must be wrong", sorry about that. Not endorphin person? That cannot be too good.

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

Why did Helen Keller cross the road? Hoefuwpugosihfioapfsoihosw[

What's black and red, and covers most of your body? Fourth degree burns. You should say your goodbyes.

Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He chickened out.

why did the monkey fall? he got hit by a train

okay so theres this guy.

I have a riddle. What's black and white and red all over? Nothing. That's impossible.

Knock knock. Who's there? Super Monkey Ball Deluxe. Super Monkey Ball Deluxe who? Oh no.

A duck walks into a bar. the manager kicks him out considering animals are not allowed in the bar.

hi joshua

how many babies does it take to paint a house depends on how hard you throw em

i don't hate you because your fat ...your fat because i hate you

How many electricians does it take to screw on a light bulb? 1

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was suicidal.

Your mother is so fat, she appeals to my secret fetish.

What did the Jewish man say to the Shia faction Muslim man? Even though we have different views on god and religion I value your friendship more than my religous views.

What's the difference between oreos and your opinion? I asked for your opinion.

what has four legs but cant move? dead dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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