A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the cow cross the road? Because he escaped the farm and didn't know what else to do.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Ask me if i'm a tree. Q: Are you a tree? A: No.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Roses are red, violets are purple.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the scuba diver say to his partner when he got stuck in some seaweed. Something that sort of sounded like glug, or maybe blub, or some other sound you would hear trying to talk underwater.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did matt daly want to go to prison? to be fondled

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

A blonde girl walks into a hairdressers and asks for a slight trim. She leaves the hairdressers fairly happy with the result although she was unhappy with the price which she later concluded was most likely because of the rising inflation. However overall she felt it had been a successful outing.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't he got ran over half way.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What's tiny and smells like a big banana? A tiny banana

thumb_up thumb_down -16

what do you call a black man on a killing spree? whatever his xbox live gamertag is. that would probably be most appropriate

thumb_up thumb_down -16

*knock knock* Who's there? ...Who's there?... *opens door to find a dead baby on the front door step*

thumb_up thumb_down -16

There is a mountain and there are three men, One is asian and the two others are black and white. "This is for my people!" Said the asian man when he was falling for his death. "This is for my people!" Yelled the african american. Then he takes the American man and throws him off the mountain

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did the chicken cross the road? Well, seeing as the slaughterhouse was directly across the road from the farm where the chicken lived, the man who owned the farm led his flock of chickens across the street when they were of age and fattened up so that they could be inhumanly massacred in order to process an order of chicken nuggets.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Whats funnier than a barrel full of dead babies? two barrels full of dead babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Life is like a box of chocolates. Sometimes you get the shitty coconut ones.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why did I write this joke Because I'm board as hell

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a black is sexuel but a white nothin without a car.i mean im nothin i dont have a car i mean realy where do you get a car?its awesome but stupid.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What did the Asian say after he had a nightmare? Nothing his nightmare was actually reality and a dishwasher fell on him and killed him.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why does my friend pick up garbage? Because he is a garbageman.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

What starts with P and ends with O-R-N? Popcorn.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

How do you know your roommate is gay? His dick tastes like shit.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

a white guy walks into a bar luckily he is not an alcoholic and knows when to safely stop drinking and already gave his keys to a friend.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? She was deaf and blind.

thumb_up thumb_down -16

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops