How often do you remember a dream? Well what if I told you that this is a dream go ahead pinch your arm. You probably didn't feel pain. And just incase jump out a fifth story window. Come on do it. Now if you are still reading this you are either dreaming or didn't jump out the window. Shame on you!!!!!!

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

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What do vampires cross the sea in?

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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There are 10 fish, 5 of them drown, how many are left? 10, fish can't drown

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

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How many dead babies fit in a car? Ask Casey Anthony, she'll probably know.

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how many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? 2 one to hold the latter and one to put it in

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A man driving through a thunderstorm said, "look, it's rain, dear." His wife, being a reindeer, took offense to that statement.

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Two blonds walk into a building....they couldnt see it.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To escape his burning car wreck.

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What does a black kid get from Christmas? a blunt

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A Jewish man and a blonde were in a DIY store, the man buys a box of screws. The woman gets a phone call to find out her son is late for tennis training. She then hangs up the phone and leaves the DIY store with great hast.

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A gay man named pat played on a gay website with a child named Charlie

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Why did Princess Diana cross the road? She wasn't wearing a seat belt.

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Q: What's funnier than rape? A: Many things such as murder or nuclear warfare.

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Why did the plane crash? Because its pilot was a loaf of bread

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What do you call it when you have sex with a black man? Sex

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A priest, a pedophile, and a child rapist walks into a bar. He orders a beer.

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Did you hear the one about the man who went into the jungle wearing nothing but leopard print underwear? He was suffering from psychogenic fugue disorder and had no idea who or where he was. He was eventually eaten alive by a flesh-eating centipede. When his wife found out, she committed suicide.

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Julian Ha.

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What's big and purple? Barney

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops