Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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What's scarier than the most horrifying monster you can think of? The thought of Donald Trump becoming president!

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What do you call a black man with a small penis? Aids free

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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Why was the snowman afraid of the sun? Because he would melt that day and die

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What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for christmas? A bike.

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Did u know that 10/10 people die?

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What did one prostitute say to the other prostitute? I'm dying of AIDS

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Whats pink red and silver? A baby chewing on reason blades. Whats pink red silver and smells bad? Same baby two weeks later.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar. The bartender refuses to serve her because she is not yet 21.

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a black guy hates chicken.

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-How do you kill a douche? -You stab him untill he cries out in mercy and stops moving.

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your mama's so ugly, she suffers from chronic deppression.

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A cat walks into a bar. She belongs to the owner, so he gives her a saucer of milk.

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What do a Jew and a whale have in common? They're both Jewish. Except the whale.

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How did the Jewish husband and stay together forever? They didn't. They ended up in divorce like 50% of all other married couples due to irreconcilable differences.

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I was going to type an anti-joke but I totally forgot how it starts. It goes something like something something something something something your mom's a whore.

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms and she was blind.

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You can talk the talk - but can you walk the walk?

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Why did Stephen Hawking ask for pizza? Because he was hungry.

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i like your face... HAHAHAHAH just kidding you make me want to projectile vomit.

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How many people live in China? At least ten.

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69

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The snails are salting one by one Hurrah! Hurrah! They fizzle up until they're gone Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting two by two Hurrah! Hurrah! They melt until there's only goo Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting three by three Hurrah! Hurrah! Some shells and slime is all I see Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die! The snails are salting four by four Hurrah! Hurrah! We shaker-salt them even more Hurrah! Hurrah! We salt the snails and hear their wails As they melt and die!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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