A man dies on the operating table and finds himself in front of the Pearly Gates. St Peter looks at him and says " You are having a hallucination due to all the drugs they have given you and because your brain releases chemicals when you die. I am not real and there is not heaven or a god." Upon resuscitation the man contemplates his hallucination and becomes an Atheist.

Why did Lucy fall out of the tree? Because she sting by a wasp.

An old man walks across the street. Several cars start to honk in irritation, for they are in a hurry and the man is walking quite sluggishly.

Robin, get in the car!

What did the old man say when those damn kids stepped on his lawn? Nothing one of those kids killed him around three years back....

September 11 was the 9/11 of all terrorist attacks.

What if algebra teachers were actually pirates, and they're making us find the X so they can search for buried treasure?

A duck walks into a bar and is immediately shot to prevent the spread of bird flu.

Why did the hipster's coffee burn his tongue? He drank it before it was cool.

Knock Knock. Who`s there? Hadooouuuuuuu! Hadou who? KEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEN! PERFECT!!! Perfect Bonus: 38493483948394839483984 Skill 0000000 Your life 0 Bonus 9001

I'd love to submit an anti joke, but unfortunatley I don't own a computer.

a dog walks into a bar....it sees the horse and starts barking which ever dentally startles and confuses the horse resulting in tables and chairs being knocked over .

Three men walk into a bar, the bartender asks why are you three men in here? The men look confused and suddenly leave

Why did the chicken cross the road? It was a turkey, idiot.

What do you get when you mix a ginger with gasoline? a forest fire.

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a passing car.

An irish man walks into a bar. He drinks responsibly, and leaves shortly afterward.

who has a vagina, likes men , soundslike afive year old girl, has some sweet boobies and onlyhas one hair on his little vag? Robert sweeny

Why was Jimmy so upset? Because both of his parents died.

Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because I pushed him.

You might be a redneck. Sorry.

Why did the black man walk into the white house? Cause he lives there because he is our president

Did you hear about the kidnapping in New York? He woke up.

What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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