Two women were sitting quietly.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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what's gray, red, and goes over a 100 mph? a toad in a blender

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A wife says to her husband "Everybody's coming over tonight, I want you to dress nice." *logically this cannot happen because there is no way that this couples residence can fit all 6 or so billion people in the world, nor would they want to.

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What did Ann Frank say when she dropped her icecream Nothing because she was captured by Natzis

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What is round and bad-tempered? A vicious circle

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why was six afraid of seven? it's a long story, and six doesn't want to talk about it.

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knock knock Who's there Rick Rick who Your wife's boss she got into an on the job accident and will never walk again... I'm sorry but your insurance doesn't cover the injury.

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What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

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whats worse then falling out of a tree? Cancer.

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how do you kill a bird? tie it to a tree throw a wasp nest at it and run the tree over with a semi filled with manure

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What do you call it when Justin Beiber has sex with a woman? Intercourse.

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A guy walks into a bar. No one notices he has epilepsy.

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little miss muffit sat on her tuffit eating her curds and weigh along came a spider and sat down beside her and said hey whats in the bowl?

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Why didn't the new baseball cap fit little Tommy? Because Tommy was decapitated

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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How do you make a clown stop smiling? Hit him in the face with an axe.

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A man walks into a bar and says Ouch.

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Why did the man commit suicide? Because all meaning in his life were gone.

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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People thought hitler said "I want to burn the jews" he really said "I want a glass of juice".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get hit by a car and die.

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A panda walks into a bar, orders some bamboo shoots, and bamboo leaves, and eats them

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops