What do you get when you eat all potatoes Their all gone

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Q: When is a door not a door? A: Before it has been asembled or after it has been taken down and no longer maintains the physical form of that which a door typically has.

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i have a six pack.... of crayons......... just kidding i ate two of them

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What did Han Solo say to Chewy before they got in the Millennium Falcon? Chewy, get in the ship.

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What's the quickest way to a man's heart? A knife.

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Who, what, when, why, how, where, and which? Your Honor, i think my client would like to plead guilty.

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Did you hear about the fire in the shoe factory? All the inventory was destroyed.

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Whats worse than getting raped by jack the ripper? Getting fingered by captain hook.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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What's just not right? Left

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Justin Bieber walks out of a closet.

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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A man and a bird are on the edge of a cliff. The man falls off and dies and the bird flies away because birds can fly and people can't.

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When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in someone's eyes.

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Why couldn't Mary see the painting? Because she had no face.

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I hope your not allergic to bees Because your about to be attacked by a live tiger.

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A black man and a white man crash their cars. they promptly exchange insurance information and apologize to each other about the inconvenience.

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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A turtle and a rabbit are having a race. The rabbit goes really fast and sees the turtle so far away. So the rabbit takes a short nap and waits for the turtle for a little challenge. Suddenly the rabbit wakes up and sees the turtle about to cross the finish line. The rabbit runs as fast as he can, but it was too late. A bus runs them over and they both die.

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why was 7 afraid of 6?that is impossible it is older than six and stronger than its mother

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Q: Why are Cats called Lolcat? A: They forgot to put "i" between l & c

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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What did the Fish say to the other Fish? Nothing, fish cant talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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