Why was the fat kid the last one to lunch? He'd had lead bricks stapled to his ankles by the skinny kids.

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

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What did the Jewish boy get for Christmas? Nothing, Jews celebrate Hanukkah.

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Why did Steve Jobs step down as CEO of Apple? Because he died.

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How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

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roses are red violets are blue show me your bed i wanna fuck you oh and roses are red violets are blue nice tits.

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Roses are red Violets are red I have Ebola

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Why didnt jimmy go to school? He had a hangover

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Statistics show That people with the most birthdays Live the longest

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Q. what has 2 tums and a boner. A. a horny guy <3

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what does the sloth say to Jonah reincastle? nothing Jonah is the sloth

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A horse walks into a bar, the bartender says: Why the long face? The horse says: "My wife's dead."

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Why do people on this website suck? Because they are n i g g e r s and jews!

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Want to hear a joke? 12 year olds

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Q. If you're paddling up river and you lose three tires, how many pancakes does it take to cover a doghouse? A. Purple because ice cream has no bones.

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"I vant to blood your suck!" warned Darcula.

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What do you call a man with no friends? Terry

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Did you see Stevie Wonder's new car? ....neither did he.

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Why did the man throw his son out the window? His house was on fire

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why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

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I walked into my sister's room and slipped on a bra..........it was a boobie trap

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I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

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A Scotsman, an Irishman and an Englishman walk into a bar... They enjoy their drinks and leave.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops