Why didn't the priest move in with the two rabbi? Because having three adults between the ages of 18 and 65 occupying the dwelling would have violated their insurance policy.

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Why was the man worried? because he had a shotgun up his ass

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Q: What's worse than finding a fly in your soup? A: Getting your face smashed with a hammer.

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A jew walks in the german bar, the jew is captured tortured, raped, and shot along with his entire family

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“When life gives you lemons, don’t make lemonade. Make life take the lemons back! Get mad! I don’t want your damn lemons, what the hell am I supposed to do with these? Demand to see life’s manager! Make life rue the day it thought it could give Cave Johnson lemons! Do you know who I am? I’m the man who’s gonna burn your house down! With the lemons! I’m gonna get my engineers to invent a combustible lemon that burns your house down!”

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What's 13 inches long and 3 inches wide and drives women crazy? My diick

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What's brown and sticky? My ass.

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Why from a friends phone? I demand a full explanation, here, you got my number, you got my home address, and who the hell was that crying little bitch on the phone? I got friends in the UK which owe me some money, and nothing to lose, if I have to take care of you before you take care of me and even possibly my wife in the crossfire, I will take you down and everything in my path! Moral: Got ya!.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

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Why did little Timmy fall down? Because he was shot in the head.

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why did the semen cross the road? i wore the wrong sock today.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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what hurts more than getting shot in the arm Getting shot in both arms!

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How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

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A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks an assistant, "Can I buy that TV"? He says, "Sure, no problem." She then walks out of the store, happy with the purchase that she made.

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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What's black and white and red all over? A seriously infected scab.

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"Have you guys ever seen Derrek Ashmores sisters? They are DTF if you know what I mean" - Jesse Ziegenbein

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What's sad about the Holocaust? Lots of men, women, children were brutally murdered in horrible ways.

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Q: what is green and looks like grass. A: fake grass

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What's worse than a bee sting? 2 bee stings. What's worse than 2 bee stings? A Holocaust. What's worse than a Holocaust? 3 bee stings.

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knock knock whos there? i dont know arent you supposed to get the door?

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A Jewish person was found dead in an alley way last night, Hitler did nothing wrong.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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