Why did the monkey ride a bike? Because he was taken from his natural environment, abused for years and forced to ride a bike.

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What's red and can't speak ? A strawberry

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A boy asked his dad Why are Chinese eyes like that. His dad replied there concentrating that's why there so smart The boy went up to a student in his class and said look I'm like you The teacher asked who told him that he said his dad The dad was called up by the school when the teacher told him what his son did he went GOOZILLA His wife asked him what he was up to and he said farting on her face when she was a sleep 3 days later he found out his wife was cheating on him he knocked on the door only to realize he was on drugs and that he never had a family.

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Dani Barton is not that! She is a great girl with a strong heart and feelings. The statement below is a joke, hence why it was published on AntiJokes. This is NOT a joke however.

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Knock, knock. Who's there? Who. Who who? "My name ism't really who, it's Thomas. I thought it'd be funny if I made you say who who, as though imitating an owl. However, I understand that childish jokes like that are not funny and if anything stupid and immature. I am sorry for wasting your time. I will go continue my solitary life alone in a crappy tenement... Damn government. They have money to fight wars against foreign countries and yet no money goes to feeding the poor. Do you think life of easy for me loving like this?! I'm such a lost cause not even my own parents want to see me! And I'll be damned if they're still alive. A dad who beat me and got drunk even night, and a mom with breast cancer"(Thomas, overwhelmed, proceeds to have a mental breakdown). The man at the door comes out to comfort him. "It's alright man. i'll help you out." He let's Jeffrey stay with him for the next four months. They both get raped by a T-Rex.

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A murderer walks into a bar with a knife. He then stabs seven people and is then arrested shortly after.

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Why was the black guy being talked to by several policemen? Because he was advertising a new renting deal on an apartment downtown and the two policemen were openly gay and have a right to live together.

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A:Knock knock B:Who´s there? A:Beat B:Beat who? A:Beat your ass if you don´t open that door!!

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A man walks into a bar, and is brutally slaughtered by eight drunk customers.

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ccjcjcjcjcjcjjcjcjcjjcjcjcjcjcjcjccjcjcj why

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what happened when Bob told a joke? Joe laughed.

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A guy asks, "Why was my mom in your bed?" The other guy replies, "Because your mom has a mental disease which inhibits her ability to process thought."

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Terraria

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Man 1:Doctor Doctor, I've got 59 seconds to live! Man 2: This is a chemist

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What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

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Why do beavers have flat tails? They don't know but their relatives certainly get upset

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Whats the difference between a Jew and a Pig? One makes bacon when smoked.

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This guy was walking down the street and a homeless guy asked him for money. The guy said "Why don't you get a job?" So the homeless guy began to cry because all he wanted was a dime not to be humiliated.

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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Why was the little boy inside the house instead of playing with his friends outside? His dad just died from cancer.

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I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

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Knock Knock Whose there? The pizza you ordered That's weird, the Pizza I ordered shouldn't be able to talk

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what do you call an octopus with 9 tentacles? a male octopus

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women's rights

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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