Why did the welshman cross the road? To violently hump sheep.

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what do a pizza and a jew have in common? they both burn in an oven

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If you could eliminate one thing in your life, what would it be ? My ex.

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how do you hurt sombody? cut off their legs.

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Why do people laugh at the number 69? Honestly I don't know, its just a number isn't it?

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Q What did Stevens mum say when he asked to be an astronaut A no your heads too big

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What gets you a succesful life and career? Swag

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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Why did the woman fall off her bike?? Because someone threw a fridge at her!!!!!!

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How do you create an antijoke? Story written by Danny and Patrick

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Why did Hayden Bryant walk down the street? Because he can, dont doubt Hayden Bryant.

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How old was the baby when it took its first steps? That question is impossible to answer due to the fact the parents had an abortion and the fetus remained unborn.

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why did joe diragi cross the road there was food on the other side

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Two men enter a room. Two men and a baby leave the room...

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knock knock no no you go now i clean

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Yo mama is so old, the bone structure of her spine has decayed significantly since she stopped growing and has therefore shrunken in height considerably. Her face and hands have accumulated abundant visual wear; wrinkles, and has arthritis as well.

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my goldfish never writes me back when i send him letters

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Once Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked a guy so hard that he got a large bruise.

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what do you do if you see a black man covered in hot greece on the floor of the bus shelter? call an ambulance...

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Jane: The house is supposedly worth $ 6 million Jack: No way! The figure is made up.

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A man walks out of his house and sees a......BIRD!!!

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Q: If a hen-and-a-half can lay an egg-and-a-half in a day-and-a-half, how long would it take a peg-legged grasshopper to kick the seeds out of a dill pickle? A: He'd give up.

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Why could susan not get up? Because her limbs were hacked off by a African militia group.

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We are both missing the picture here friend, those bastards chose to fuck up my eye themselves, and while I do not completely trust you, (as far as I know you might still be a faggotqueer trying to mindfuck me), I trust you enough to take my chances. As for my eye, its fucked, I see light with it, and that is pretty much what I am going to keep seeing from it besides it looks like shit, on the bright side I look 20 percent more bad ass with an eye-patch than without, I am physically and mentally scarred, and as far as physically goes, I dig the look. Dont worry, you seem overly concerned about what people here are gonna think, it is ironic how the shitty system here makes it so easy to hide ones identity, you know if people do it right, know nothing about computers myself.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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