What do dogs and whales have in common? They both live in the ocean. Apart from the dog.

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Why can't Mich Jackson draw a perfect circle? Because he's dead.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Hi. Hi Who? Hi who?! Hi Ho Hi HO. Its off to work we go!! umm.

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Why did nobody answer when billy knocked on the door? Billy was a loaf of bread.

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Shark week? More like owl week. Hoo!

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What has feet, but no legs? An alien.

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How did the mexican die while fixing a lightbulb? He fell off the ladder.

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You heard now that you can not only bet safe at net casinos, but also win safely? Win safely? The hell does that mean? You mean you could win unsafely before? Like the betting casino crashing after you win a million? Moral: That crap is even less moral than I am ffs! Now they give you like 5000 game bucks free just to get you addicted.

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Why was the boy sleeping on the curb? he wasn't actually sleeping, he actualy just got hit by a car and had already died.

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Why did it look like the girl peed herself? Because she peed herself

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I've got Alzheimer's, Who are you?

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What do a bicycle and a platypus have in common? They both have wheels, except the platypus doesn't.

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What's worse than seeing another antijoke with "The Holocaust" punchline repeated? The Holocaust.

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How many black people does it take to screw In a lightbulb.....I can't see them.

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cake cake and no cake, your life just ended

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Chuck Norris can right-click with a mac mouse

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Why was the five-year old lying in the middle of the sidewalk? Because he was dead.

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what is long on joe? Not his dick thats for sure.

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why do girls like grey's anatomy so much? because they are girls

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Q: What's the difference between a Boyscout and a Jew? A: Boyscouts come home from camp.

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what movie can a retarded 8 year old play the lead role in. Zathura

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Facilitator huh? Sounds like someone that kills someone standing in the way, or bribes off others.

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Do not be unreasonable now, as for the twenty five million dollars, it is the least I can do, but if we cannot agree upon acting with some reason and dignity, as refraining from insults, then no conflict will ever be solved... ...I will send you my contact information shortly, expect the money within the week, three or four days tops. Would you be interested in learning more about our order? We make good use of people such as you. With all due respect, I would not exactly lend my sister to anybody that brags about engaging into intercourse with his own sister.

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What did Harry Potters owl say to Harry Potter? delivowe for hawwy potter!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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