How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -3

On christmas, a bunch of happy kids get machine guns for christmas.Meanwhile in afghanistan, a bunch of dissapointed kids are getting ice skates.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a black flying an airplane? A pilot you racist bastard.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

So you are a giggler huh? You ticklish too? Anyway, you ever watched Deathnote? I was gonna ask something kinda important but it disappeared, so you tell me stuff first. Oh, my parents? Well, they where nice and sweet, but lets talk about something cruel and horrible. (If you switch up nice and sweet with cruel and horrible and the opposite, you will get the picture I am trying to pain here) What makes me so much more interesting huh? And why are you afraid you may look like an Alien? HEEEEEY! I am a legal citizen and I am not freaking Mexican!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Knock knock! Who's there? A doorbell-salesman

thumb_up thumb_down -3

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "why the long face?" The horse begins bucking wildly, injuring three patrons before breaking through the front door.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What has four legs and rocks? Your baby kitten that just got stoned to death.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. Where did Little Timmy go for Christmas? A. Auschwitz

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats up and also down? your mum

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you do when you see someone from the kkk? Accept what you saw and move on with your day

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q. What's worst than getting kicked in the balls ? A. The holacaust

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call someone who puts one number on here as a joke? Someone with no life.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What's brown and sticky? Vomit.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do you call a mix between a mexican and a octopus? Actually, at this moment in time it is physically and morrally impossible to do such a thing. Scientists have yet to find a way to split the genes and create a cross species. lol jk its called a moctapus.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: what smells like cheese and tastes like cheese? A: cheese

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q:where does baby oil come from? A:Only the finest of babies

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Pickles

thumb_up thumb_down -3

What do a baby and popcorn have in common? They both pop in an explosive manner when put in a microwave and both can be consumed by the person who may have put the baby and popcorn in it so if you think this is funny then you have some problems and i will shortly in some period of time when my schedule is cleared refer you to a licensed psychologist and we will make an appointment for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why did Dom move to Wales? Because he is poor!

thumb_up thumb_down -3

whats in a red suit with a white beard and jolly......st.nick jerking of and blowwing a load in your stocking while taking a shit on you coffee table before theen hanging it back up over the fire place

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Why doesn't superman eat peanuts? Because he doesn't like them.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

How can you tell if a duck is quaking? Hear it

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Q: Why was the little girl cowering in a closet in a corner. A: Because there was a murderer/rapist in her house with her oarents gone.

thumb_up thumb_down -3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops