roses are red violets are blue everyone is stupid how about you? -I'm not Im black

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What is black and likely to fail? A chain smokers lungs.

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How do you kill a lawyer? Stab him 50 times in the chest, slit him open and take all of his organs out one by one. Burn what you have left. That should do the trick. OMG I AM EVIL

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This winter: "The seal is broken, as the spirits of hell go across the world, I can help you find them Clint! But only you can prevent them from killing your family!" "I will do whatever I must!" "Be careful, you can only see them with medication sample X, and destroy them with the super addictive Meladocs 5" "HOW DO I KILL THEM! I CANNOT HANDLE MORE MELADOCS 5! ITS ADDICTIVE AS HELL!" "Only you can save us Clint, only you can do this until their world malfunctions saving us all, but killing you in the process!" "I WILL... I CAN!... UGH... HOW MUCH LONGEEEEEEEEEEEEER!" THE PACKMAN: THE MOVIE.

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why didnt the little boy say goodbye to his mom because he got hit by a bus

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You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

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why was the little girl crying? Because her family was dead

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How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie roll tootsie pop?

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There are two eggs sitting in a carton in the refrigerator. The first egg says, "Sure is cold in here, eh?" The second egg replies, "Holy crap! A talking egg!"

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He is outside, running for it, Erron, seriously who is We? I thought you where an author.

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See what I did here? ;) Ladies, I just need some space okay? Damn Space Invaders... Ijustmetthespaceinvaderstheytookmyspace << DOUBLE MEANING!

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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What's worse...a thousand dead babies in one joke...or one dead baby in a thousand jokes?

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Humans and dolphins are the only species who have sex also for enjoyment.

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Who's a pedophile and not afraid to show it? The clown from McDonald

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What do you call people in a plane crash? Whatever, i wasn't on the plane.

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A white man, a black man, and a woman are drinking in the local pub. The black man and the woman are hanged. Medieval European pubs did not permit either.

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What did the dead baby say to horse? Nothing, it was dead

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N-E Pats never cheated

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Hey dude when is 4th of July? I don't know.

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Your momma's so stupid, she threw out all the W's in the m&m's packet

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Roses are blue Violets are unicorns This doesn't make sense Refrigerator

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Indians

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what has one ear, one leg, one eye, one arm, and is Jewish half a Jew

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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