Why did the boy collect poop? Because it was it was his dogs shit.

Whats worse than a mother of 3 children, jumping off a bridge, smashing into the metal roof of a large car and dieing on impact? A mother of 3 children jumping off a bridge, smashes into the metal roof of a large car, survives,, becomes paralyzed, and has to explain to her children, why she is in a wheel chair for the rest of her life.

What did the jew do to his waiter? He explained how he had provided excellent service and left a very generous tip to applaud his efforts.

Two monkeys are lying in a tree. Big monkey and little monkey, little monkey bites the big monkey's tale, big monkey starts jumping around the place shouting. Little monkey just starts laughing and takes another sip of whiskey.

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? No. Neither has he.

Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

Knock Knock. Who's there? (knocker runs for life).

Did you hear about the dyslexic atheist? He didn't believe in santa.

Knock knock. Who is their? Grammar. Grammar who? Of course you don't know.

What do black people and tables have in common? Nothing.

whats worse than the holocaust? i don't know, the holocaust was pretty bad.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms. Why doesnt she have arms? they got bit off by a shark. Knock knock. Who's there? Not the girl.

roses are brown violets are brown who shit on my garden?

The president, Oprah and Abraham Lincoln are sitting in a crashing airplane. lol

What do you call a hispanic man hopping a large fence? A hispanic man hopping a large fence.

Ellen: Knock knock Steve: Who's there? Ellen: Banana Steve: Banana who? Ellen is offline and can't receive messages right now.

What's black and white and read all over? Half a zebra.

Who would win in a fight between superman and flash? Chuck Norris

Why did the chicken cross the road? It is theoretically impossible to read another's inner thought process, but it was probably due to the electric stimulation from the brain to give the chicken's muscles the ability to move.

what is the difference between two trees? it doesn't matter because motorcycles don't have doors

Q. What did the Cat say to the Dog? A. "These humans are so jobless.."

What do you call a guitar with only one string? A guitar.

If I am from Texas, where are you from? You know the answer? HOLY SH*T! YOU ARE A GENIUS!

What did the muslim get for christmas? Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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