What is yellow, has wheels and lies on its back? A school bus after a horrible traffic accident

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A sign at the drug rehab centre said keep off the grass. Jimmy thought it was a joke. So the groundskeeper chopped his legs off.

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roses are red violets are blue i'll be back in an hour or two

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What's something that really sucks? Having a homicidal cat on your chest.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead.

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what did the pizza say to the bread? nothing pizza cant talk

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derp

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Stop making fun of Stevie Wonder, you dont seen what he has.

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How do you get a cat off a swing? You throw a dog at it.

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Why did the blond girl walk into the street pole? Because she wasn't paying attention.

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It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta pudding god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

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i like my coffee like i like my women. without a penis.

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What do you call a million pigs jumping out of an aircraft? Bacon.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? because i was on the other side and we were going to catch a movie

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so your paddling up stream in a cement canoe, one wheel falls off. how many pancakes does it take to shingle a dog house? 46 cause bears dont like eggs.

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I once had my heart broken by my first true love. I then died, she was convicted of murder and my family grieved over my death.

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What do a bike and a human have in common they are both objects

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What do you call a black man that likes potatoes? Whatever his name is.

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Yes you better be sorry, I'm gonna suck my mums p e n i s tonight! - Dylan Hodge

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Knock knock. Who's there? Silence. Silence who? No, I meant there was silence, I didn't really say anything. Oh, OK. But seriously, who's there?

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Q: Whats Worse Than 21 Dead Babies in a Trashbag? A: 1 Dead Baby In 21 Trashbags.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

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why did Rebecca black get down on Fridays? because she had school every other day of the week.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops