What did the kid with turrets CHEESE! say to his mom.

A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

What did the boy and the dog do at the park? Nothing, the dogs dead

Something strange in you're neighborhood. Who you gonna call? The police.

A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks, "Why the long face?" After hearing this common expression, the horse looks up at the bartender. With this look, the bartender realizes that he has been speaking to I'll Have Another. Aware his faux pas, the bartender apologizes and pours him a free drink. The free drink does little for I'll Have Another's crushed dreams.

theres no I in Intelligence a.w. j.p.

what did the chinese man say to the convicts at the side of the road? so long gay boys what did the convicts do to the chinese man? nothing he was in a car

Tried to type an ascii of a penis, failed

Knock knock Who's there Bill Bill who? Bill Thompson

hat did the fridge say to the oven your hot baby \

big fat hairy gigantic enourmous erectionn CC

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

What happens if you don't stop, drop, and roll? Astigmatism.

what did the history teacher say to his class? Get your books out.

Why don't women have breasts? Because they have dandruff. Get it? Hint: "dandruff" = "dan druff"

Chuck Norris farted and... several people looked around uncomfortably, not knowing how to react to the embarrassing situation.

Why do people carry around spoons? Because they like to do them

Safety in numbers? Try telling that too six million Jews.

Why did the man cut his hair? Cause he has cancer

What are jews without the holocaust? Alive

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Because the light was green.

How many kids with ADHD does it take to change a lightbulb? I dont know lets go play on our bikes.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't so much cross the road as he did go down the road, to the supermarket, where he was sold to a family of 5, and taken down yet another road to the family's house, where they enjoyed a nice family dinner.

Whats the opposite of red? Fish!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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