What's long, hard, and black, and goes into wet things? A submarine.

were at work systems r down

What did the blond do on October 12th? Get hit by a bus

Where did Betsy go after the explosion? Everywhere

How do you burn Lebron James's house? With fire.

karn chevalier

Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

A man walks into a pole and says "I know, this pun is lame"

How many squirrels does it take to drive a refrigerator 10 quarts per elephant? Vanilla Cake

What did obama say to the united states of america YES WE CAN

Three blondes walk into a bar. They have an intellectual conversation over some drinks.

Why are Indians so bad at football? Curry

Your mommas so stupid she put a quarter into a parking meter and waited for a gumball to drop out.

Whats the difference between black people and white people? They're both people.

You know who can't stand to put up with my shit? Polio victims.

How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1, but if the ladder is shaky, you might need another to hold it up.

What's the difference between a tiger and a shark? One's a land mammal.

If little Timmy buys 80 candy bars and eats 67, how many candy bars does he have left? Diabetes. Timmy has diabetes. So he was disowned.

You always hear of the 9/11 stories where people who work in the World Trade Centers were late that day or home sick or whatever. My mom also worked there. It was a normal morning, got up to make us breakfast, got us to school on time, the whole bit. After having to do all that stuff, she actually got to work on time, and she died in the attack.

What is the difference between a black man and a burnt pizza? -Nothing there both black.

What's the difference between a convertible and a dead baby? One's in my garage, and one's a car.

A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender says "Why the long face?" And the horse says "I have cancer".

Why did the chicken cross the road? The cognitive capacity of the chicken is significantly underdeveloped in comparison to humans; thus, comprehending a chicken's motives is impossible. Furthermore, interspecies communication is largely understudied - a mysterious division of science that may never be fully revealed. Therefore, one could safely theorize that no single human could breach this gap ...in communication differences (assuming chickens do, in fact, communicate) and in turn, could not understand the chicken's reasoning behind its choice to cross the road (excluding the possibility of psychic connections between chickens and humans [see 'Dog Whisperer' for a more clear explanation on interspecial psychic relations])That being said, the only scientific and logical way one could understand the aforementioned question is through observation. For example, perhaps food was located on the other side of the road. However, this seems to pose a plethora of other questions: Why was the chicken near a road and not in a coop stocked with adequate food? Was this a wild chicken? Are there wild chickens? Do wild chickens often cross roads? Are wild chickens dangerous? If so, why hasn't there been warnings about dangerous, wild chickens crossing roads? The answer to these questions may never be discovered or explained.

Yamum is so poor that she has trouble supporting herself and paying her own bills. Subsiqeunetly she had her electricity and home phone cut off, not that she would have any use for a home phone with her electricity cut off anyway. She sits on her bed and cries herself to sleep each night and has been thrown into depression due to her spiraling financial debts of which she can see no end to. This has led to several attempts to take her own life to hopefully finally find a way out of her misery and debt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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