If 2 trains are going 60 mph, their going in opposite directions towards each other, they are slowing down 1 mile per hour per 10 miles and they are 100 miles away, would you rather have Coke or Pepsi?

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A man walked into a bar. He was meeting his friends but was 30 minutes early so he went down the road to buy some food. He had recently began dieting after watching a series of lifestyle programs which informed him of the potential risks involved with high cholesterol and blood pressure levels. He purchased a garden salad and a freshly squeezed orange juice, and made it back to the bar in time to meet his friends.

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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Your mamma so fat she bungie jumped straight to hell

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How do you make an electrician cry? Kill his family.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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How do you get a baby to stop crying? Run it over with a lawn mower!

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I was going to tell a joke about your mom's vagina, but that's overused.

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Why can't the black person drown? He is very well trained at swimming.

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A black man walks into a bar and he orders a margarita. The bartender says that the margaritas are exceptionally delicious in this bar. He was right.

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Why can't you get a pterodactyl use the bathroom? Because they're extinct.

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A man walks into a bar and sits down. The bartender then lights him on fire.

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What did the banana say to the apple? Nothing, although on a deoxyribonucleic acid level, bananas are technically sharing 50% of their genes with us, humans, but yet still have the incapability to produce its own voice. In addition, apple can't talk either due to their lack of nerves, veins, arteries, and diaphragm, therefore bananas not apple cannot produce sound.

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A women walks into a bar which is means she is pretty rich to be able to have a bar in her kitchen

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what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

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THE GAME.

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Why couldnt Jimmy ride a bike? refrigerator

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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A blind man walks into a bar. And a table. And a chair.

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what do you call a man with a bullet hole in his leg? A man who needs t see a doctor.

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What do airplanes and trees not have in common?? Bananas

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What's worse than taking a final? Getting shot in the face.

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Why did Susie fall out the swing, Because I hate disabled people and i pushed her

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why did the donkey kick the men bc he tryed to pen the tail on hes ass

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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