Nero, seriously, one way or the other, ill kill you, my mom blushes like every time people talk to her so fuck you, my sister if you touch her, ill.... Man, stop and ill forgive you, and I am very very sorry, now stop sending me those pics, and please do not post them anywhere, Line would not want to.

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One day, a small bald man was walking up the street, when her saw a large red porche, extremely grand, and the door was wide open. He walked over and inspected the open door, and to his surprise, the keys were in place by the steering wheel. He was a good man, with a loving wife and two teenage children, and he had no intention of steeling the vehicle. But astonished by the owner lack of protection, he hopped into the car and drove it around the block, just for the thrill of riding such an amazing car. Around 30 seconds after, he parked the car, got out, leaving the car in the same place, with the door open and the keys in, then he walked home and lived the rest of his life.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. why did the squirrel fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the monkey.

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What's the difference between men and coca-cola? I don't like coca-cola

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What do you tell a women with two black eyes? Nothing, you've already told her twice..

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Why was 6 afraid of seven? because 7 brutally beat and raped 9

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4 gay men walk into a bar,but there is only one stool..... What do they do? Turn it over

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Q: What do Magic Johnson and Freddie Mercury have in common? A: Freddie Mercury is dead.

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Knock, Knock!! Who's there?! The Police!! Open the f*cking door and get down on your knees.

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Why did the guy fail his driving test? He was blind.

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Q: What's pink and fuzzy? A: Pink Fuzz...

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Two muffins were in an oven. One of them said, "It's sure hot in here!" The other muffin didn't respond because it's dead.

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Why did the women die? Because She was a Squirrel.

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Why was the strict Asian father angry when his son got an A- on his test? He found out that his son had been cheating.

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how many jews does it take to fit in a mid-size sedan? -5 comfortably.

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What's worse than a worm in your apple? Two worms in your apple.

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Q. What do you get when you cross a bird with a human? A. Arrested.

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What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

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What is worse then falling into a lava pit? Nothing you idiot.

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Do you know what it looks like when you put a cat in the microwave for 3 minutes? I don't know either because I close my eyes when I masturbate.

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Miscarriages.

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What do you get if you cross a Kangaroo and a Sheep? They are too entirely different species and cannot be crossbred.

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Why can't Helen Keller have sex? She is dead

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? It wasnt due to the fact that numbers have no feeling.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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