Twelve muffins were baking in an oven. One muffin said "Where are we?" Another muffin said "Yikes! A talking muffin!"

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When the mom got home from work, she was very tired. Her 6 year old son asked her nicely to make him a PB&J sandwich. She said sure and made one. Her son was very pleased and ate all of it. He knew he had a great mom. I actually lied above. The mom was killed by three men in hoodies in her back yard. They came inside and also murdered to boy. Worst of all the killers stole all of her food including the rasberries the boy was looking forward to eat. I guess it doesn't matter now since he is unable to eat anymore...

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Guess what I saw today?..........Nothing I'm Blind.

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How did the boys sunglasses fall off his face? He was drop kicked.

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What do you call a black police officer? The drug dealer's inside man.

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Patient: "Doctor, my arm hurts when I poke it with my index finger." Doctor: "That's because your finger is broken."

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wat do u call a person who is ugly ugly

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Why did the boy fall of the swing He had no arms

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Whats the difference between a pizza and a Jew? A pizza doesnt scream when you put it in the oven!

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what do you call a brown man that has been repeatedly shanked and has been fucked up the arse by 10 Rag heads in one night and thrown in a well to slowly and painfully die? Lloyd.

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I like trees. Trees hate you. Bye.

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a man walks into a library Who the hell reads

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Q- Why? A- Why not?

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Sanderson. Sanderson who? You're boyfriend. Let me in. No, I'm a bit busy chopping up dead bodies. Come back in a bit. Oh let me help you! I like the way the blood runs out of the fresh ones!

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A black man walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I wont serve you." The black man says, "Why? Is it because of the color of my skin?" The bartender says, "No, didn't you read the sign on the front door? It says, "People with suits on will not be served." So the black man took off his suit and was kindly served.

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Doctor, doctor, I think I've got a problem! Correct, you have got acute cancer, you have 2 months to live.

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I want seaman but sex with interracial men body builders. Please call me - 843-813-2788

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roses are red violets are blue bullets are lead now i shoot you

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Man: Would you like to see someone Man 2: Sure Man: How bout the inside of an ambulance

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a read head, a brunet, and a blonde sneak into a merchant ship. security hears some noises and goes on to investigate. all three girls jump into banana sacks. security guard kicks the first sack with the read head in it and she growls like a dog, so the security sees its a dog and keeps on walking. he then kicks the sack with the brunet in it, she goes on to hiss like a cat. so then the security guard kicks the last sack with the blonde in it, and she yells out "bananas!"...the end

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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I'm on a seafood diet. It consists of prawns and tuna.

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A dyslexic walks into a bar. He called it a bra because he was dyslexic and dyslexics misspell things. People laughed at him because mental disabilities are inherently humorous to them.

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Black Ops? That sounds illegal. Anyway, what do you mean you are a employee only? I mean if you where a fed, you would either be on the top, or be an employee no?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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