A man stumbles into a bar and yells, "Let's get wa-" and falls to the floor dead. The forensic scientists preform an autopsy and find that after 15 years of achoholism and depression caused his heart to stop beating. His family may have mourned his loss, if he had not left them penniless after killing his wife.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

how many strippers can you fit into a garage? as many as you wanted depending on the size of the garage, but after so many gathered in the same building it is a good probability that some strippers would leave.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the good thing about having sex with KL..... Nothing because she is a fat man

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is the difference between a mexican and a bench? One is living, one is not.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How may Alzheimer's patients does it take to screw in a lightbulb? To get to the other side!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man was complaining about not getting enough sleep. He was then raped.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

roses are red, violets are blue. sunflowers are yellow, i bet you were expecting something romantic but no this is just gardening facts.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you cross a Labrador and a Poodle. A species of dog that has been cross bred.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: There was a cinnamon bun and a cow out flying, one of them fell.. who? A: The cinnamon bun because cinnamon bun's can't fly.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Don't tell anyone, the Health Department is already on our backs.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A horse walks into a bar, it is then frightened and bucks a man in the chest. Animal control and an ambulance are promptly called. The horse is then taken to a stable, while the man is taken to the hospital where he later made a full recovery.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

If Voldemort was gay who would be his partner? Happy potter

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Two fish were lying on a bank. One said "I can't breath." The other one was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What did the pony say when it had a sore throat? A: "I have throat cancer and only have six weeks to live."

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

did you hear the one about the elephant with a screwdriver? me neither...

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q. How can you tell if a snake bites? A. It depends on if he walks to school or carries his lunch.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Kevin stinks signed Taggart. Is this how you do it!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Which way do 4 gay guys walk South then past the milkbar then around the corner

thumb_up thumb_down +6

why was the black guy that was smoking weed in his car not sent to jail? when the cop pulled him over he thought he was black the way he was dancing but turned out to be white but that just looked black when hes dancing.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Bear walks into bar and says to eagle may I have a................... drink eagle says why the long pause hohahahohahahohaha

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What's worse than losing the remote? Dying of cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why was the napkin wet? Some water was on it

thumb_up thumb_down +6

what do you get when you combine an astronaut, a microwave and a bathtub? A suicide investigation

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops