Why did the man need new glasses? He was thrown off a bridge by a leprechaun.

What did the Little 8 year old boy do when a big black man walked into his house? He said "Hi daddy", then they happily ate dinner together.

What's the difference between a black man and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

How do you starve a zombie? You dont, they are allready dead.

Wanna hear a joke? Your life.

What happens when a girl sticks her head in a birthday cake? She gets a toothpick stuck in her eyebrow. Trust me..I know.

What did a boy dying from cancer get for Christmas? The news that his cancer progressed and he would soon die. He underwent a surgery that got rid of the cancer and he was cured. He ran out of the hospital in excitement and got hit by a bus. He recovered slowly, but lived. By this time it was June and his birthday, he returned to school later that year. He got called fat and committed suicide.

A duck walks into a bar and orders 2 beers and a shot. The bartender says "That'll be four fifty." The duck says he doesn't have any money and asks if the bartender can put it on his bill. The bartender says "No." He then picked the duck up by the neck and raped him mercilessly. "That's what he gets" one patron said. "Yeah, he was asking for it"

A Chinese man a Mexican and an American are all on a plane. They are all trying to get rid of stuff they have to much of in their country. The chinese man throws out a bowl of rice and says " we have to many of these in our country" the mexican throws out a taco and says " we have to many of these in our country" the American throws out the mexican and says "we have to many of these in our country"

What did the man do when his truck was stolen? He contacted the police, who immediately began searching for the culprit. He then contacted his car insurance company and was soon compensated for the full value of his truck. One day the man was in his new truck listening to the local news and heard that the thief was found and convicted of Grand Theft Auto; his name was Martin Kaiser.

Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

Michael Vick walks into a pet shop. He buys a puppy and cares for it lovingly

if got a joke if fogot it

Knock Knock Who's there? Bob Bob who? Your neighbor

Pete and repeat are in a boat. Pete kills him self due chronic depression. Repeat laughs his ass off

I never drink liquor alone... except for when I'm alone.

Well Erron, its your lucky day then. I wont even ask what a cream pie is.

Hey man how was the trip to Hiroshima? Great it blew my mind!! And how was Nagasaki ? It was the bomb!!

hohifooncuiohicvsdhn ioshd

What did Helen Keller get for Christmas? Glasses

What happend to the girl who went to school dreased ugly She took the other students advice and whent home and killed her self

If roses weren't RED and violets weren't Blue... Walls are still solid objects.

What do u call a gay dinosaur? Dinosaurs don't exist

what did the boy with no arms or legs get for christmas? cancer

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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