A fat man orders a pizza. Then after eating it, he gets a eart attack due to his high cholesterol and lack of exercise

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What is the difference between a calendar and you? A calendar has dates!!

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What's worse than getting an erection in church Getting an erection while naked in church

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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What do you call your mom after she brings a guy home from a bar? A very caring woman because she doesn't want him driving drunk.

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What did the alphabetical soup spell for little Bobby? U gOt SUzie prEgnant ....... aGaiN

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Why did the lorry cross the road? It was swerving to avoid a small child. Unfortunately the driver's reactions were too slow and he hit the kid. After a week fighting for their life in hospital the child fibaly died. There wasn't a scratch on the lorry though.

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a horse is a horse. of course of course....unless its a cow

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What's the best thing about 23 year olds? There's twenty of them.

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A black man and a mexican man are in a car. Who is driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. The mexican, Alex, had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. Rain had suddenly come upon them and a passing off-duty police officer had picked them up and took them to a nearby hotel. The three men had drinks and the friends had a wonderful rest of their trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months after their return John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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What is the difference between a Homosexual and a Heterosexual? They are both Black.

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If you give a mouse a cookie, he will probably eat it then have a heart attack due to the high level of sugar in the cookie

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shut up elliot

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What did Steven Hawking get for Christmas? ------ ------ ------ A bike.

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

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Two guys walk into a bar. This is really exciting as they haven't seen each other for two years and are looking forward to catching up.

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What's like a whale and has a sprained leg? MATT ROSS THE FAT ARSE!!!!

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A loving father took his two children to the park for a picnic. while the children went into the lake for a swim he drowned them both

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a potato a chicken and a rooster ate a cat and you just wasted your time

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quinn knows four other quinns but he ruined my life so he tells me to stop because im ruining this website but i disagree and now he is trying to tell me a joke and im not listening he is still trying but i don't care because i hate him,

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Damn kids and their evasive tactics.

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Why was the boy running There was a giraffe chasing him

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There were 3 women, a blonde, a brunette, and a redhead. They all had different colors of hair because hair color varies depending on genetics.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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