what do you get if you cross a motorway with a wheel barrow? Arrested as a wheelbarrow is not a motorised vehicle, or even a vehicle at all and therefore it is an offence to cross the motorway with it, actually it is probably an offence to cross a motorway with anything now that I come to think of it

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Justin Beiber

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What did the kid with no arms and legs get for christmas? Cancer

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Why did it take the rabbit so long to enter the rabbithole? Because he was hit by a truck and lost a lot of blood.

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Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

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Someone with a lame joke: What's black and white and red all over? Smart person who decides to mess with him: Nothing, if it is red all over how can it be black and white???????

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A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

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Q: Why did the chicken cross the road A: Will Smiths rapping attempt was suprisingly not harmful to his career as he later played in blockbusters such as Independence Day, Men in Black, The Pursuit of Happiness ect..

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John said: "This roller coaster makes me green." HIs mother replied: "That's because you have leprosy."

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Why can't Helen Keller drive a train? Because she's blind.

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Why is my girlfriend pregnant? We wanted an abortion

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what has a huge nose and is jewish??? Henery Miller!!!!!

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What happens when you agree to disagree? You extend the duration of the argument.

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Much to my surprise, the Hoover Dam was not built by beavers.

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What do you get a Jewish boy for Christmas? Nothing he died in 1943!

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What did the fireman say to the people in the burning house I'm going to use this water for my sprinkler rather than saving your lives. I might as well use this for something more significan, like my lawn.

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What do you call Madeline McCann at the bottom of the sea? Drowned Madeline McCann.

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What is a name of a kid with down syndrome. Adam Hebeison

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My left foot has 6 toes, my right face has 8 Q-tips -Matt

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*see an orphan* Knock knock Whos there Not you parents ...

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knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

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what did Harold Camping say to the little girl and boy? "You and your parents are going to die today"

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A dyslexic man gets asked what 1+1 is, he replies with a wopping 11. Grats <3

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What makes boys so stupid? They like to play with girls' hearts and break them until they spew out blood all over the place.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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