A black man, a white man, and a group of Jews were all walking down the street. They got hit by a bus.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

Did you hear the one about the bus driver? Me neither

Knock Knock. Who's there? A cannibal. What? You are about to die and be eaten. Asshole! i will murder you first!

What did robin say to batman before they got I the car........ Get in the car.

Your momma's so fat: She fears a lower life expectancy and consequently not seeing her grandchildren grow up.

Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

Yo' mamma's so poor she's homeless and dying of starvation.

A ginger man ascends to heaven and reaches the pearly gates, seconds later he wakes up in a hospital bed and realizes it was merely a near death hallucination and God isn't real.

your mothers so blonde she has yellow hair.

What do a turtle and an eagle have in common? They can both fly. Except for the turtle.

Twelve men walk into a bar, and get stuck in the door because it's far too small for all of them to walk through at the same time.

I once did something.

What has 4 legs in the morning, 2 legs at noon, and 3 legs in the afternoon? A dog that got its hind legs chopped off, and then only got 1 prosthetic one.

What did Santa say to his elf? Nothing. Santa isn't real. Elves aren't either for that matter.

Once upon a time there was a cowboy. He died. The end.

good morning. good day. good night. good to see you santa

Why did Jorge eat Larry's face? He was on bath salt.

How do you get a clown off of a swing? You throw an axe at its face.

Q. How many grains of rice can you fit in an egg? A. Fire extinguisher.

A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

(you will only get this if you play minecraft) whats green and looks like a penis? a creeper!

Roses are Red, Violets are Blue, well at least they were, until I met you!

a man walks into a bar... he was then shot to death because he was a slave in the early 1800s

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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