What's green fury has 4 legs, and if it fell out of a tree it would kill you. A pool-table

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A baby seal walks into a club.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the road Who the f*** let out the chicken

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How fast can you paint a fence with babies? Depends how fast you can throw them.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two black guys walk into a bar. The bartender says "what are you doing here" and the black guys say "to get a drink"....

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for his birthday? A basketball.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

What did the clock say to the book? I have no batteries.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the boy fall off the zipline? He had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

your mummas so ugley that it looks like it court fire and your family put it out with forkes

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walked in the kitchen with a gun. He made a sandwich.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Nigel Farrage and the concept of UKIP.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I will slap myself once for every like this joke gets!

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When is a great time to eat chicken fingers? Never Chickens dont have fingers therefore making it misnamed and impossible to eat them

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A blonde, a brunette, and a red head walk into a bar. You think they should have ducked?

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many flies does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two but I don't know how they got in there.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

How many dueche bags does it take to change a light bulb? 0 They're two complete unrelated things

thumb_up thumb_down +19

When is a door not a door? When your burns down.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

69

thumb_up thumb_down +19

A man walked into a bar. He got a concussion and couldn't see strait for days.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the black man eat lucky charms? Because it was breakfast time and he was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

thumb_up thumb_down +19

I wondered why the baseball was getting bigger. But it wasn't actually getting bigger, it was just getting closer. So I got hit in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down +19

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops