What did the little boy get on christmas morning? Cancer.

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What did the homosexual get for Christmas off his boyfriend? A lovely present off his loving partner.

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roses are red vilots are blue in soviot russa poem read you.

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Did you hear the one about the pizza and the salamander? Neither did I.

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Who stole the cookie from the cookie jar? Actually it's my cookie jar, and my cookies. I stole nothing.

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Rebecca Black walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender doesnt serve her because she is 12.

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Q: What does the fox say? A: Nothing. Foxes cannot talk.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had down-syndrome

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Why did Jack take a prune out for the evening? A healthy snack as part of a balanced diet.

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Feel free to call me, forget the money, as for my fucking eye, I just sure as hell hope those responsible are rotting in prison. I mean I just lost an eye right? Just kidding, I am the one who has been dead wrong here, I judged you wrong, I am the fuck that seems to feel responsible for the actions of others at times, then again I thought that you where sending them against me, they surely claimed they where, but fuck, people use all sorts of things and people as an excuse to do whatever the hell they want.

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A man and his wife go out to dinner, after dinner they return home safely and the man kisses his wife good night. He then leaves his house, and goes to a bar with another women. He is a polygamast and it is socially acceptable in his town.

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What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

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Dear Jim, I have a problem with my Hymen... "Jim'll fix it for you..."

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knock knock whos there open open who the door

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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What is black and bad for your teeth? A cannon ball

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What's worse than being a replacement? An insufficient replacement.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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What does a man want more than sex? Nothing.

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Why did the black guy wear a hat? To keep the sun out of his eyes

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Wuy are Kenyans so fast? Because due to variations in evolution, people from that part of the world have a better muscle build to run at higher speeds than equally trained athletes from other parts of the world.

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What's the best part of the 1980s? They're over.

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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Listen Nero, you consider us like friends too right?

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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