What did the bank teller say to Santa Claus? May I help you?

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree?? It got shot Why did the 2nd monkey fall out of the tree? It was stapled to the first monkey

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where was the heart of ocean found. madelain mcanns urn

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haha your power hose was robbed and the shitty bike

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Why did the black man cross the road? Because he lived an worked on opposite sides of the road, and so consequently needed to cross the road to work, and provide an income for his family, so they could have fresh food, clean water, and have money to pay the bills such as the mortgage so they didnt become poor and homeless, which would inevitably lead to illness and an early death for them all.

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What did the white doctor say to the black doctor? We both went to medical school.

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How many hipsters does it take to change a light bulb? ...You mean, you don't know?

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What do you call A potato who is covered in red refrigerators and is known as a potato. Fallafal

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What's brown and sticky? "A stick?" No, poo.

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ill have a no.9 a n.9 large

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what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

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Why can't Hellen Keller watch Spongebob? She doesn't have the proper cable service

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

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What is black and burns really well? charcoal.

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Why is it unpleasant to eat a meal with lots of basketball players? Because they will be focussing entirely on discussing tactics (especially if there is an upcoming game), and therefore will probably not be displaying good manners or making polite mealtime conversation.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I have a gun, Get in the van.

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A lion walks in to a bar, and murders everyone inside. This is why animals are not aloud in bars.

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Why was little Jimmy sad? Because his mum died.

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jingle bells jingle bells,, bells were jingled!

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What's worse then failing a math test? Your mom getting shot

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why does the world spin? Chuck Norris says so

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How did the fat man survive the plane crash? He didn't, he died like everyone else!

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you first

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What are annoying? Ads.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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