Whats the worst way to find out your married. Hungover

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His Royal Highness was hunting in the forest accompanied by his squires and hunting dogs. A man, screaming, ran wildly out of the brush and addressed the hunting party. He said, "DON'T SHOOT! I AM NOT A MOOSE!! PLEASE DO NOT SHOOT!!!!" The king calmly raised his rifle to his eye and fired, hitting the man in the temple, and instantly killing him. A squire frantically turned to the king and said "Sire! Why did you kill this man?! He CLEARLY said he was not a moose!" The King replied "Oh! I thought he said he WAS a moose..."

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Why did the mailman say hi to you? He was trying to be friendly

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When life gives you lemons, Commit felonies

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Q: What does one man with alzheimer's say to the other man with alzheimer's. A: Purple, because magic doesn't go through chickens.

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What's big, blue, and eats rocks? A big blue rock eater.

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Why was the woman in the kitchen? She came in to give her husband, who was washing the dishes, a kiss before she went to bed early so she could be well rested and get up on time to make the 45 minute commute to the hospital where she worked as a neurosurgeon the next morning.

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3 Women were on a desert Island, This Island was situated in the middle of the Atlantic so there was no hope of survival.

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What do you call a Mexican in a kitchen? A chef.

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What's a black man that drives a bus? A bus-driver

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Two muffins are in an oven. They say nothing, muffins are inanimate objects and therefore cannot talk.

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Your mom is such a big whore that she sleeps with your dad.

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What you do if you poo out a slug? Eat it.

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Why do cats have nine lives? Because they don't have ten.

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How did the little boy get lost? He didnt he got dragged into a van and was raped violently.

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penispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenispenis

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What has four legs in the morning, three at noon, and two in the evening? A baby with leprosy.

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what did the apple say to the peer... I taste better !!

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why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

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What did Batman say to Superman before they got in the car? Get in the car.

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it tastes good.

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A man copied someone else's joke on anti-joke, people looked at it and said "That's funny, but they copied it", then they moved on to the next one.

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i look around to find that my air head is missing, i then figure out that i had eaten it.

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What happens when an antijoke and a joke comes together? Unicorns mate with Neil Patrick Harris

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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