whats worse than loseing your dog? getting raped by a clown.

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what's the difference between a black man and a bench? the bench is an inanimate object

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What did the man get from killing his own wife and children? A boner.

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What's brown and sticky? Molasses.

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A man walk into a bar he buys a few drinks. When he is done the bar tender gives him his check. Man told the bar tender he has no money to pay for it. Bartender says," ok how about this we have a horse in the back that hasn't laughed a day in his life if you can make him laugh you get the drinks for free." so man proceeds to do so. A few minutes later man comes out horse is dying. So the man gets his drink for free. A few days later man comes back with the same deal. So the bartender tells him" that horse hasn't stopped laughing since you went back there. If you can make him stop you get your drinks for free." Man goes in a few minutes later comes out horse is crying. Man man is remarked by how he did it but he doesn't question it. A few days past the man comes back an the horse is still crying...... So the bartender ask the man how he did..... Man says," first I told him I had a bigger dick then him....second time I proved it"

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Why did the man fall of his bike? He wasn't on his bike, i drowned him yesterday.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Hi, Steve!

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A young boy is concerned about the well- being of his father, due to the fact he may have cancer. Turns out, he doesn't. So they got ice cream.

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Have you ever seen the movie called "The Tourist"? No

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You were adopted and I couldn't think of a good way to tell you...

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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minorities

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What happened to the alcoholic man that decided to never drink ever again? He died of thirst. Moral: Alcohol was the only available liquid in this twilight zone... Anti anti joke

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Why wouldn't anyone want Helen Kellers dog? It's been buried for a long time...

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Knock knock. Who's there? Justin. Hello Justin, please come in.

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What do you call someone that blows up a plane? Nothing you were on that plane

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What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

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Your momma is so stupid, because she didn't get a proper education

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? a fish:)

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Where did the guy who shot his neighbor go? Jail, because he was caught, sent to court, and was convicted of murder.

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What do you call a 5 year old with no friends? A sandy hook survivor

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??????????? ??????????????? "Hello, idiot teacher! You eat milk."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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