How did little Jimmy survive the 5 story fall? He didn't

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Roses are stools, Violets are bums, sugar is knit, thank you, LSD.

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If Jimmy in New York has 2 apples, and Tommy in Denver has 4 apples, what is the mass of the sun? 1.989E30 kg.

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Did you hear about the 2 pretzels walking down the street? It's not true, pretzels are not capable of autonomous movement.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Slowly being tortured to death.

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What do you call a fish with 6 legs? A fish with 6 legs.

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The WPGA tour

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hi

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Penis.

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Your playing NBA 2k12 and some one steals the man your covering and you scream "THAT'S MY MAN!" what sounds wrong in this situation?

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What's big long, harry, and has glowing eyes? I dont know. Its under my bed. PLEASE SEND HELP!!!

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What happened to the little girl who fell into the lake? She was rescued and made a complete recovery.

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Once a upon a midnight haven. Along came a cow name Mr. Maven. For they say the cow was very lucky. But oh what a day for something very mucky. Oh ye the coming of Mr. Maven and his milk. And for every cereal there will be silk. But wait isn't Mr. Maven a guy? How can you milk him even if you try? I don't know, just sounds cool.

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Everybody has a penis! EVERY BODY! WHY can't feminists admit this obvious anatomical fact? Gahhhh!

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What did the fish say after he swam into a wall? Dam

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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Knock Knock Who's There Nobody Nobody Who?

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This is funny.

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There is a dead guy on the road lying in a puddle of blood with a gunshot wound on his head. What happened? He died

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Q: Why do homeless people smell bad? A: Because they live on the street and they dont take showers it's very sad sometimes.

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Youre mom is so dead...

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You cant spell chorus with out... Vagina!

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A racist man walks into an all black church. He has no problem with the people there as he is a black man who hates caucasion people.

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Why the kid can't get off the water? Because your feet is on his head

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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