Try this on your friends and make them look dumb So a plane crashes on the border between the USA and Canada. Where do you bury the survivors? You don't bury the survivors.

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Why was the tree sad? Trees cannot think or move, and thus cannot feel emotions.

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what do yo call two dog? dogs.

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What did the boy get for christmas? a new lining

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Roses are blue Violets are red This isn't humor The Hell's wrong with you?

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guy walks into a bar, ouch

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Whats whats black, yellow, wnd green all over? The Jamacain flag

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Knock knock whos there? Underware Underware who? I underware my friends are

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What did the fish say to the human ? He didn't say anything fish can't speak.

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What happened when the man was about to hug the sexiest person he ever saw in his life? He hit the mirror.

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Why is it irrelevant whether someone is a twat or not? Love your neighbour.

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A man called the police and was later arrested for murdering himself,

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you put the chevy to the levy when your pants fell heave diarea

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Why was the ginger angry with the manager of the hardware store? His smoke detector didn’t come with a snooze button.

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Why would Jesse Ziegenbein and Terran Hansen make a good couple? Because they both smell like shit and are fat as hell

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Why is it okay to have four cats? Because I said so.

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she is both deaf and blind. Driving would be an extremely hazardous action for herself and other nearby drivers.

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How do you make a clown cry? You hit them with an axe

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Q. What did tthe little kid say when the bully punched him? A. Ow.

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What did one door say to the other door? Nothing, cause doors don't talk.

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snooki

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Q: Why did the mom try to wake up a sleeping bag? A: Because it's morning and her kid is curled up inside fast asleep

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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