Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the slaughterhouse was on the other side.

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What's up with airplane food? Well I am a big fan of peanuts, so nothing

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There was a man with a job and kids. One day he came home from his job and went to sleep. He never woke up because it turns out he had a heart attack.

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What's up? Up Adverb: Toward the sky or a higher position. Preposition: From a lower to a higher point on (something); upward along: "I climbed up a flight of steps". Adjective: Directed or moving toward a higher place or position: "the up escalator". Noun: A period of good fortune. Verb: Do something abruptly or boldly: "she upped and left him". Synonyms: adverb. upward - upwards - aloft - above - upstairs - overhead preposition. on - upon - over - along - with adjective. rising noun. ascent - rise - upgrade verb. raise - enhance - increase - lift - rise

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What do you get when you watch Cinderella backwards? A woman who learns her place.

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What do you get when you mix C4 with a lit- KABOOM!!!

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What do you get when you cross a dead monkey, a chair fitted with wheels for use as a means of transport by a person, Isaac Newton & the creator of the website? Stephen Hawking.

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Did You Hear About That Mexican Who Went To College? no. Well plenty of them go to college every day. thats good to know.

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What is more boring than watching paint dry? Aids

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why couldn't the blonde change the lightbulb? she couldn't find the leperchaun at the end of the rainbow

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Q: A young friend you met on the internet invites you over to his house. When you arrive, Chris Hansen enters the room. What does he say? A: Welcome to our home

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No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

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A guy finds a lamp in the desert and rubs it 3 times.. No genie appears because there is no such thing as Magic.

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what electronic vegetable sits in a chair? stephen hawking

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GAWS SI EKOJITNA

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What super hero did they choose to be on the Blue Jays' team? Batman!

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why did the girl fall down someone threw four monkeys and a refrigerator at her

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Why was Timmy's hair shaved? He had cancer and was going though Chemo.

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Derp

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a wall? A: Depends how hard you throw them.

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ejaculation JLR

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Yo mama so fat she left the house in high heels and when she came back she had on flip flops. tom halls mum

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what do call a car full of people on the side of the road? a cool explosion waiting to happen

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Yo mama so fat when she went to the ocean the whales started to sing we are family even though your fatter than me

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops